A measly 3.5 weeks ago I was pregnant and oblivious.
I remember during the last few weeks of my pregnancy when some of the lovely ladies that I know who were lucky enough to already be mommies would say things to me like “Enjoy it while you can!”, “Sleep in before its too late!”, etc. etc. I know them all well enough to know that their requests of me were coming from a place of love, but I’ll tell you what- I wanted to punch them all in a hormonal rage! How could I possibly sleep with this baby torching my throat with a flamethrower and tap dancing on my bladder every night? How could I ‘enjoy’ the misery that I was going through? Surely those self-righteous Mommies had forgotten how awful the last few weeks of pregnancy were!
They say the grass is always greener, and I have learned that is especially true of pregnancy and motherhood so far. Now that I am newly crossed over to the other side, I want to (and have!) grab every pregnant woman that I can by the shoulders, shake them, and yell “ENJOY IT WHILE YOU CAN!” “SLEEP IN BEFORE ITS TOO LATE!” ETC. ETC!
I am suddenly, simply by default of having experienced childbirth and caring for a newborn, one of those aforementioned self-righteous mom-bitches, too.
I spent so much time toward the end of my pregnancy wishing time away. I didn’t revel in the relative ease with which I could run out the door on a whim to go grab a quick bite to eat. I didn’t close my eyes and breathe in the peace and comfort of relaxing on the couch with my husband watching marathon of our favorite TV show without interruption. I did not appreciate the last few mornings I was able to sleep in past 6am or nights where I could sleep for stretches longer than 3 hours. I feel I did not spend an appropriate amount of time sorting through my feelings about ending the previous chapter of my life, and I don’t want to start this leg of the journey the same way.
I am happy to bring you along as I begin to stumble, milk drunkenly, into the realm of Mommyhood.